29th October 2000, 09:48
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TRANSLATING WOMEN'S ENGLISH: Yes = No No = Yes Maybe = No We need = I want I'm sorry = You'll be sorry We need to talk = I need to complain Sure...go ahead = I don't want you to Is my butt fat? = Tell me I'm beautiful Do what you want = You'll pay for this later I'm not upset = Of course I'm upset, you moron! Are you listening to me?? = Too late, you're dead You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me Be romantic, turn out the lights = I have flabby thighs You're so.. manly = You need a shave and you sweat a lot Do you love me? = I'm going to ask for something expensive It's your decision = The correct decision should be obvious by now You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about?? I'll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV How much do you love me? = I did something today that you're really not going to like TRANSLATING MEN'S ENGLISH: I'm hungry = I'm hungry I'm sleepy = I'm sleepy I'm tired = I'm tired Nice dress = Nice cleavage! I love you = Let's have sex now I'm bored = Do you want to have sex? What's wrong = I guess sex tonight is out of the question I love you, too = Okay, I said it...we'd better have sex now! May I have this dance? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you Can I call you sometime? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you Will you marry me? = I want to make it illegal for you to have sex with other guys You look tense, let me give you a massage = I want to have sex with you in the next ten minutes Let's talk = I am trying to impress you by showing that I am a deep person and maybe then you'd like to have sex with me I don't think those shoes go with that outfit = I am gay LOVE "U" GUYS 
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